Intro

Luxury goods create desire by forcing people to covet the barely achievable. Luxury is something of high price and little value. A complete waste of time and resources all to signal that you have so much that not only could you afford to waste resources but you are proud of it. In a world defined by technology and complexity, the simplest, most innate human things have become the most luxurious. Presence, gratitude, and a positive mindset are the luxury goods of the 21st century. These are the simplest things. These are innate to human nature and are the most under our control and yet they seem to be woefully out of grasp. With phones, the world is at our finger tips, but we are losing touch with our innate being. Technology was promised as a tool to enhance life but functions more like a trap that ensnares our minds and controls us.  

We are trapped by the technology we have. It restricts us from the core tenants of human happiness. Why are we, in the words of George Lucas, "Living in cages with the door wide open." We freely forfeit our minds to our technology. Presence has become a luxury good partly due to addictive technology, partly to societal indicators of status, and partially due to us wanting to be in the cage. Being present is now the signal of wealth. When we are glued to our technology, we are signaling someone has a claim on our time. That could be a boss who can call at any moment, or a notification to tell you how many people liked your post to affirm your social status. When you are online for any reason, you do not have control over your life. The people who built this technology seem more acutely aware of this dynamic than others. Mark Zuckerberg severely limits his kids' technology use. Steve Jobs didn't let his kids have iPhones. The world has made goods more accessible than ever. We can pay less than $1 for a banana grown a thousand miles away at any time of year despite fruits being "seasonal." We could pay $200 for a massive TV to watch the Hubble telescope live stream literally looking into space from our couch. It seems nothing is out of our grasp but the ability to be present enough to appreciate these moments. This is why experiences have become the luxury goods of choice because they are the last thing to not be commoditized. In a world driven by experiences, complete awareness of the moment is vital to get the most out of those experiences. Modern luxury is being at the most coveted place doing the most coveting thing without the obligation to document it for others. In every moment, accountable to only yourself and the moment.

Giving True Presence a Shot

LeBron James is one of the greatest basketball players in history. He set the NBA scoring record in 2023 at the Staples Center in LA in front of tens of thousands of fans. The image that sticks from that night is when he pulls up to take the shot that a second later would set the record. Every fan paid thousands of dollars to have the chance to see this one moment. These people are seeing history in the making. However, when you actually look at the picture, you don't notice faces in the crowd but phones. People paid that money not to watch but to document, so they could signal they were there. The picture indicates that no one actually wants to be there but only to tell others they were there.

There is only really one person watching. One man sits in the front row, taking in the game while the other 20,000 people document the moment. This man is the only person to truly experience it. Everyone will leave with a picture in their phones that captures a moment they never really experienced. This man will just have that fleeting moment. The man without the phone is Phil Knight, the founder of Nike. He doesn't need a picture. He needs the moment. A social media post does not change his life in the slightest because he already has the infinite clout of being Phil Knight. Everyone else there feels like they need to capture the moment. They need to prove to the entire world that they were there. They need to rob their presence to show their status. The picture shows that true status is being able to just watch that ball in the air. To be fully present.

Presence throughout history has been what people anchor to as the meaning of life. Life in many ways is confusing and amorphous. There is no point. Achieving goals often just makes those goals feel empty and prompts us to set new goals that we believe will be more fulfilling, only to find them as empty as the last. Most people just chase the hamster wheel. What is so messed up with Phil Knight that he can't just aimlessly run on the wheel like the rest of us? When Phil Knight took Nike public, he made $200 million dollars. In this moment he learned the life lesson he showed that night. After going public and becoming richer than anyone could imagine, Phil felt regret, "My secret regret is that I can't do it over again. God, how I wish I could relive the whole thing." Through his words and actions at that game and in that moment, Phil is telling you the secret to life. Life is just a game and the meaning of life is to play the game. Life satisfaction comes not from the record shot, not from the end of the journey, but from the play and joy experienced in getting there.

Present and Positive

We all see the world through the same perspective, our own. Everyone is tasked with being the narrator of their life. To interpret the perceptions of each moment. Presence allows life to be richer by expanding the scope of your perception. When you are willing to listen and observe, you take in more life. Presence enhances experience and your experiences are the raw materials for your life. The interpretation of those moments determines the quality of your life. 

Great, we want to control our mindset, but what does that even mean.  What mindset should we adopt?  While there are so many things we can do and believe, the true key to a mindset is simplicity and achievability.  We should simply choose to be positive.  Positivity is our choice and leads to a much better life than choosing negativity.  A positive mindset does not have to be fleeting, unattainable, or situation dependent.  A positive mindset does not even have to be happy or positive in the traditional sense.  A positive mindset is one rooted in hope.  A mindset that sees the silver linings of every situation and believes that we deserve and will have a good life.  A positive mindset is an appreciation and active commitment to the present in construction of a more enjoyable moment and better future.  Positivity is not perfection nor is it prophecy.  However, by choosing a positive mindset now we give ourselves the best chance at a life we deem worth living. 

What does a positive mindset look like in action and when do we most need it? Anyone can be happy in their best moments, but a positive mindset creates the life you want from any situation. As the great Uncle Iroh once said, "In the darkest times, hope is something you give yourself. That is the meaning of inner strength." We can see the true power of a positive mindset in humanity's darkest days.  At 16, Siggi Wilzig was sent to Auschwitz.  Upon arriving, he told the guards he was a master craftsman – a lie but one that may have saved his life.  He carried this indomitable mindset through his time at the infamous camp.  He believed he was smarter than the guards and survived through what he described as psychological warfare with them.  A man with everything taken from him still felt superior to those who had the “power” over him.  During the winter, he was able to use his intelligence to get a job in the hospital helping other prisoners instead of outside in hard labor.  He fed and cared for the sick prisoners.  One day 80% of the men he fed had died, including his father.  He believes the food had been poisoned without his knowledge.   An experience like this could shatter a diamond, but Siggi’s mindset was “Never give up. Only death is permanent. Everything else can be fixed.”  When faced with the toughest challenges life could provide, Siggi chose to live defiant to the desires of his captors.  He never gave up the hope and belief that a better life stood past this painful experience.  Often a sign a prisoner in a prisoner of war camp had given up was they were no longer willing to trade cigarettes for food.  They had opted for the last bits of pleasure to end their painful experience.  Siggi maintained hope that freedom and a better life was in his grasp even if it was visible not on the horizon.  His mindset coupled an intense desire to live with a stubborn unwillingness to die. 

Siggi’s mindset wasn’t positive in that it was rooted in a hedonic sense of happiness but it was one rooted in a deep belief in himself.  He believed a better life was in his grasp no matter the situation and motivated himself to take the actions to craft that better life.  He eventually left the camp where only 15% of the 1.3 million prisoners survived.  He did not view this as the end but a new beginning.  After the war, he hunted the Nazis who had subjugated him.  He turned one of the vile acts of humanity that he endured first hand into his door to the future.  He made $200 and bought passage to America coming to the country with no money, few skills, and no knowledge of English.  He only had his mindset.  The only job he was fit for was shoveling snow for $2 a day.  He pursued each task and opportunity in life with vigor.  His mindset took him from a 16-year-old entering a concentration camp to a multi billionaire within his lifetime. 

Some people become successful due to some act of luck or chance. Siggi was not one of those people. Given every disadvantage in his life, he willed himself to success. His mindset was the nuclear fuel that drove his life. Crafting a positive mindset like this turns the life we are given into the life we want through the internal power we all contain. Unlike external things in life, a mindset shift takes a moment and lasts forever.

Why does gratitude simply suck

Presence is a simple awareness.  A positive mindset is an active choice.  Gratitude is the appreciation of the outcome.  We can be grateful for a personal achievement or interpersonal relationship.  Gratitude is the last step that brings the journey together; however, gratitude is one of the most uncomfortable things in our world today.  When was the last time you went up to someone and genuinely thanked them for something small or large they did in your life?  Not a reflexive extension of appreciation for a minor act like opening a door, but a deep and genuine expression of gratitude that comes from the soul.  When was the last time you looked at your life, with all of its wins and losses, and been truly grateful to have just experienced the act of living itself.

Expressing gratitude is incredibly uncomfortable in the moment, but easy after the fact. People have no issues expressing gratitude at seminal transition events like graduations, weddings, and funerals, but rarely share those same sentiments in the course of everyday life. While this is great in the sense that it's better late than never, it's certainly not good for our life satisfaction.  Those moments, good or bad, hold so much meaning because of how integral gratitude is to them.  Through the ups and downs of a relationship, a wedding highlights how this person is so right for me that I would rather die than live without them. Until death do us part, as they say.  A eulogy likewise does not air gripes but provides thanks.  This gratitude, while important to processing a life transition, can feel empty in so many ways because you are celebrating something in the past that you will never experience in quite the same way again.

This is why gratitude is so uncomfortable because it feels like equal parts celebration and resignation. This feeling, though, could not be further from the truth when you think about it. Life is made up of 0.1% beginnings or endings and 99.9% journey, so subjugating gratitude to the 0.1% of moments will make your entire life feel a little empty. Instead of reserving gratitude for just a few moments, we should see our life as a perpetual becoming. We should see every moment as a celebrated ending and new beginning. With this frame, gratitude in every moment and for every person who positively impacted your journey is not seen as a lifetime achievement award but as a necessary acceptance of the bountiful gifts life continuously provides. We should not feel uncomfortable celebrating, but instead realize that approaching the future with gratitude makes each moment much more enjoyable and a life filled with those moments one worth living.

Thanks for Making it this far

The world is more ironic than we can begin to comprehend.  The world is increasingly getting more complex and the three key tenants to a good life remain the simplest possible things.  How can you live a good life if you wake up with a disorganized mind?  Without presence, you become a third person observer to your life.  A positive mindset takes an active approach to life.  Not only do you want to experience life, but you also want to direct life for your benefit.  A positive mindset creates the proper direction for a good life.  Why choose to work so hard to be presented with the gifts of life if you can't enjoy the fruits of your labor.  Gratitude is the bedrock of continued life happiness. The world seemingly gets ever more confusing, but in reality, the increasing complexity hides the true simplicity of the human experience.  These three things are the nuclear power of a good life.  Elemental in their nature, but explosive when harnessed.  The one thing I want you to take away from this having gotten this far is that mastering these simple things is not a guarantee of success in life.  A life where you are present, positive, and grateful is success in life.